NAPS
Xander Cage

Private. Selective.Multi-verse/ship.

Mun/Muse 21+ Written by Erick

Est. 1/2017

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For a crash course in Who The Fuck is Xander Cage, click here:

Xander Cage 101

“i’m just tired, you know? i’m just fucking tired.”

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“You want me to knock you out for a few hours, I can do that.” It wouldn’t be hard, especially not here in the Mill House. There were a few things that would make her unconscious for however long she felt she needed. Xander’d just have to find them first. 

whcwashe:

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“Honey, he’s an ACTOR.” And a pretty big guy as well, honestly, but that didn’t mean that Xander wouldn’t crush him, she’d seen Xander in action. “ — We have to go – You can find someone else to fight later ….”

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“So? Him bein’ an actor doesn’t mean I don’t have to honor the challenge. I don’t run, Liv.” He was already pulling out his sword, holding it like he didn’t know how to use it–oh, he did–and pointed it at the ‘knight’. “You go on, follow the map, I’ll be right there.” She wasn’t gonna get Xander to leave without fighting him.

@whcwashe // [✖✖✖]

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Xander had worn a sword to a Ren Faire, of course someone was going to challenge him to a duel, because that’s what these people who went to Ren Faire did. “Liv, he challenged me. I’m beating his ass to the ground.” 

whcwashe:

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“ —- blaming anything on the old gods seems like a bad idea ….” Besides, she’s sure the tablet probably came in handy for SOMEONE, somewhere along the line. She still thought that it would probably have been best to label something like that, but whatever. Her throat clears as she watches him, eyebrows furrowing as he scurries off like an overly-excited toddler. It’s endearing in a way she can’t quite describe. That doesn’t mean she understands where he’s headed. Regardless, she follows after a moment, watching him in silence before she reaches out to take the other end of the horn. Weird. All of it was weird. “ —- What is this?”

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“There’s a difference between saying ‘oh it was probably that god’s fault’ and saying it to their face, though.” Xander was honestly having the time of his life. There were so many cool things in this cabin, and so much power. He could almost literally feel it buzzing around him. Now that they were both touching it, he could hear her, and she could hear him. “Horn of Silence. Touching it, it’s like the cone of silence, but if you blow it on someone, they’re silenced for…well, I’m not sure exactly how long. I’ve never gotten to touch it before.” This could go on for hours, he hadn’t even left the first, main room yet.

whcwashe:

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“You make it sound like this is a hostage situation.” She laughed, leaning her head back to glance up at him. “Hey, what’s wrong with learning on the fly? I can get my powers under control at the same time they do. Perfect plan.” Not really, honestly, which was why her hands were all the way behind her back now, at least for the moment. “Aw, c’mon, that’s just unfair.” Although, she’d take note of the symbol, for the next time she walked by. Seemed like a good thing to have in the memory banks.

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Xander, being the sarcastic shit he was, held his hands up in surrender like she had a gun on him. “I’m just sayin’.” His eyes were already roaming for something else cool to touch. “I’ve never had kids, but that sounds like a really fucking bad idea, Liv,” he laughed, “I didn’t make the thing, blame it on the old gods or some– oh my God.” He’d heard about this big horn before, made a beeline for it. “Watch this, I ju–” when he put his hand on the horn, he went silent, still talking like normal, but…no sound, and he motioned for her to take the other end of the horn like a kid trying to get their mom to play with them. 

whcwashe:

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“That would be helpful.” John was doing his best, he seemed to know what everything was. But John was only around half the time, and that left her to her own devices, which was …. generally unfortunate. Blinking quickly when he tugs at her, she freezes, hands pulling up immediately. “ —– I dunno, I was starting to think more psychics might be a good idea. Could be cute —–” She doesn’t mean that, kids definitely weren’t in the plan, but hey. That was good to know. “Who leaves something like that around without labeling it?”

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“If you’re gonna lock me in here while you visit your mom, it’s the least i could do,” he chuckled. She wasn’t locking him anywhere, and he didn’t have to stay at the cabin if he didn’t want to, but who in their right mind would leave when there was all this stuff? “More psychics is a great idea, sure, but get your own powers and shit under control before makin’ them,” a smile on his face, “Someone who doesn’t have to worry about it affecting them. See that symbol?” Xander pointed to a specific one, “Long story short, I can touch it no problem, you…problem.” 

whcwashe:

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“I know enough to get by.” She shrugged, smirking as he wandered the cabin. Honestly, she really only knew the items she’d been explicitly told NOT to touch, but she was slowly starting to take stock in her head. “Jasper didn’t leave a list, so ….”

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Of course he didn’t do the decent thing and make a list. “I could probably take stock, make part of a list at least.” Hell, even Xander didn’t know everything in here, most likely. Kaulder could have told them everything, but it wasn’t like he had his ancestor on speed dial. He hadn’t heard about that sword, either. As she moved by him, he yanked her away from a tablet, “You should…probably not ever touch that if you don’t want kids,” he pointed, “Tablet of Fertility.”

whcwashe:

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“Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.” She winks, slouching back into the couch. “I’m serious though, half the stuff in here bites back, so just … be careful.”

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He might have been a little like a kid in a candy store…full of stuff that could kill him. Giving her a mock-salute, Xander, eyes wide, started strolling around. “You don’t know what half this shit is, do you?” Not a mean question, just an honest one.

whcwashe:

@thexanderzone

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          “ —- Don’t pick that sword up, it’ll make you start spewing secrets.”

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“You know that makes half of me want to pick it up even more.” Just half. He didn’t wanna spew all his secrets.

whcwashe:

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“I’d love to get her off my back for awhile. But I don’t wanna put you through that either. Figured you could just hang out at my dads place. She doesn’t know it’s out there anyway. And there’s plenty to explore, so ….” She shrugged, winking at him as she headed for the door. “I appreciate you taking some of the guns out though. Just in case. It’s not really a good look.” Laughing lightly, she turned to glance at him over her shoulder as she fished through her bag for the keys to lock her apartment up. “See, you SAY that, but every time a body-snatchers movie comes out, no one realizes anything’s wrong til way through the first act, so I might not even know until it was too late.”

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He shrugged, acting all nonchalant about it, “If you want, I can handle it. I’ve had worse than a Southern mother interrogating me.” Xander had had literal demons and witches trying to get him to talk, and Southern moms were pretty scary, but they weren’t demons. He’d already started to head for his car and start picking which guns could be left behind, starting a mental list. “You know what the body snatchers always get wrong with me, though?” He said like he’d been possessed before. Well. He had, that was a different topic, though, “They get how crazy I am wrong, make me cautious, make me boring. And they don’t know how any of my tatts work.” Plopping himself in the driver’s seat and his shit in the back, he grins, maybe revs the engine a little. “Let’s stop off at mine and then get some burgers and make tracks.”